To people who like reading my writing:

Sorry it's taking me so long to put up something new. Spiritually speaking, I'm pretty thick-skulled most of the time. So, God has to work extra hard on me. Anyway, I just thought I should say that Jesus is awesome. And, if you haven't lately, or if you have and aren't otherwise occupied, you should take out your Bible and read a bit. I heard this sermon a few months ago about the importance of keeping an open line of communication with Christ. One part really stuck out to me. The speaker said that, when you read your Bible, even when you don't feel anything or realize it, the Holy Spirit is working inside of you. That hit me like a ton of bricks (or some other really heavy conglomeration of stuff with a moderate amount of surface area). I know it's a little obvious, but I'd never really thought about Bible reading that way. It was a spiritual song subject when I was five, then a heavy talking point in Sunday School until I was twelve, then a form of spiritual discipline and a way to study Jesus. I had never really realized that Word becoming flesh could happen through such a passive sort of process.

Anyway, my Bible has a gravity to it now that it never had before I started sharing my spiritual experiences more publicly (as they should be shared). I notice a difference in my days when I take time out to love on Jesus. It's a good difference. You should get to experience the same sort of thing. So, if you aren't busy, or if you can manage to take a while away from whatever time sink has your interest, go open up your Bible and spend some time getting lifted.

I just wanted to pass the Word along.

On Choice

Warning: The following post may be disagreeable to some. It might conflict with previously believed dogma, and it might offend. That's not my purpose in writing this though. I'm simply trying to capture in words what I've been led to believe in my quest to grow closer to God. Even if it is disagreeable, I hope that your reading this will challenge and strengthen your faith in the greatness of God.

Warning #2: This post is long and to be read in multiple sittings if needed.

Lately, the concept of predestination has been weighing heavily on my heart and mind. I've talked with some of my Christ-loving peers about it a little, but I can't seem to come to peace with the idea of an assured destiny. So, I'm writing my own personal thoughts on the subject. I welcome responses, comments and discussion. And, I pray that my writing this will not stir up dissension but will instead point to God's glory.

First, it's important to know my current understanding of the Calvinist idea of predestination. For reference, I recommend listening to an sermon by C. H. Spurgeon entitled "Non Nobis, Domine!" which is accessible here. The following is a transcription of the piece of his sermon that is of interest:

According to some men, it seems that salvation is mainly the work of the ceature. Christ died for him, but Christ may have died in vain unless he, by something that he does, makes Christ's death effectual. That kind of teaching, I do not believe because it throws the onus of redemption, after all, upon man and makes him to give efficacy to the redemption of Christ. Neigh, verily... But I believe that those for whom Christ gave Himself as a ransom price shall surely be His forever. And that He did really redeem them and needeth not that they add anything to make that everlasting ransom price sufficient and available for their deliverance. There are some who seem to think that the sinner takes certain steps towards God before God comes to him, but it is not so. The sinner is dead. And life must come to him from God, ere he can stir from the grave or even have a wish to stir there from. And there are some who teach that after a man is saved, he still needs to keep himself and confirm himself in grace in fact that his salvation depends upon himself... But it is not so. For He who has called us and has saved us has given us gifts which are without repentance which He will never take back. And having once loved us, He will love us to the end. We are firmly persuaded that He who has begun a good work in us will perform it until the day of Jesus Christ. From top to bottom, salvation is all of the grace of God. (C. H. Spurgeon, Non, Nobis Domine!)

For the most part, I agree with what Spurgeon is saying. But, the bold points (which form his basis of belief) I do not agree with. Allow me to explain why.

• In Spugeon's saying, "those for whom Christ gave Himself as a ransom price shall surely be His forever," there is an underlying assumption that Christ did NOT give Himself for everyone. For, by this logic, everyone would then be saved. This I cannot accept. For, while I was dead in sin along with everyone else who didn't or doesn't follow Christ, there was nothing that should've intrinsically separated me from everyone else. For God to choose me above another would be an unmistakable example of partiality. I'll address this more completely later.

• "[A]nd needeth not that they add anything", in respect to salvation is particularly disagreeable to me. Here, Spurgeon is referring to a person's profession of faith and acceptance of Jesus Christ as Savior. He implies that, by stating an acceptance, the sinner is somehow validating God's grace. That is simply not the case. God's grace needs no validation. The fact is, without Jesus, none of us would have any way to ensure that a covering shroud of grace surrounded us. Redemption was made accessible by Christ's death and resurrection. But, as God is the God of love (which requires a choice), we are given the option of refusing to accept that grace. While the sinner is not adding anything to the salvation, acceptance is necessary. Or else, what does one make of Romans 10:9? This acceptance requires repentance on the sinner's part. For, what is the difference between one who says the words, then lives in sin compared to one who just lives in sin?

It appears to me that Spurgeon and I disagree on these matters, and probably those that are about to be covered.

Vital to my understanding is this: God loves us all equally. And, by "us all" I mean everybody. There is not a thing that a person can do to elevate himself above others. For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God being justified freely by His grace through the redemption that is in Christ Jesus [Romans 3:23-24]. God demonstrates His love for us in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us [Romans 5:8]. For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son that whosoever believes in Him shall not perish, but have everlasting life [John 3:16].

So, God loves us all equally. We are all sinners, and, Jesus died for everyone. Spurgeon would disagree with me here insisting that, since the sinner is dead in sin and even his desire to be saved is inaccessible, he will not believe until after God has awakened his spirit through redemption. I would then ask Spurgeon what he makes of Romans 2:11 which says, "For there is no partiality with God [NASB]". Or, if he prefers different translations:

• NIV - For God does not show favoritism.
  
• Amplified Bible - For God shows no partiality [undue favor or unfairness; with Him one man is not different from another].
  
• King James - For there is no respect of persons with God.
  
• New Century Version - For God judges all people in the same way.
  

If God is impartial, not a respecter of persons, and without favorites, then Jesus must have died for all. There is simply no other option. Either God is partial and Romans 2:11 is not true (which would make God a liar too since 2 Timothy 3:16 says that all Scripture is given by inspiration of God and is profitable for doctrine...) or else Jesus died on the cross to redeem the entire world, not just a select few.

It's obvious though that not everyone follows Christ. This seems to imply that action is required on the part of the sinner. For, if action was not required, then our automatic redemption through Jesus would provide us with no ability to choose and would make us into human robots. Make no mistake here, I'm not claiming that choice is necessary for redemption. Were God to take that choice away, we robots would still be redeemed through Christ's death and resurrection. However, the choice is necessary for it to be a loving redemption. For, love can not be forced. The downside of this loving redemption is that not all people will choose to accept it.

This choice complicates the predestination argument. For, if God knows ultimately whether we will choose or reject Him, then Jesus wouldn't have needed to die for everybody. He could have died only for those He knows will choose Him. Because of this, and because there is no Biblical evidence stating the contrary, I believe that God chooses not to know. For, if God knows our choices, then freedom is merely a concept describing an illusory idea. Why does freedom disappear if God knows our choices? It begins with the end.

Our decisions are affected by our previous decisions. That's how life works. There's a journeyness to it. So, our final decision to accept or reject Christ's gracious gift of redemption is affected by all of our previous choices. It's no great mental leap then to claim that, if God knows our ultimate choice, He must also know those leading to it. And, the choices leading up, the choices made in the accessible present, not some elusive future, are the ones that complicate things. See, if God knows all of your choices, and if only truth can be known, then you've virtually already made them. That means, however you decide to live (if predestination is true) can have no different effect on your future. For, some future version of you already decided to make the decisions that you're about to make and was either saved or not because of it (or regardless of it depending on your interpretation). Likewise, another person's interactions with you (or lack thereof) were already weighed by your future mind in order to have already made the decisions you'll make.

"What are you taking so long to say, Curtis?"

I'm trying to say this:

If predestination is true, then every person is living on a pre-specified single life path. There is no hope for change in the sense that we know it today (some of us, I mean). For, a seeming difference in a life's direction merely moves one further along the path God already knew about and judged.

If that is the way that God is unlimited by time , you cannot ever positively affect another's life. There are just no alternate possibilities for comparison... no "could-have-been"s.

In my experience, living according to truth yields positive results. If God knows all of my choices before my present self has made them, then I could keep to myself until I die. Or I could go blow some city up. It wouldn't matter, because "those for whom Christ gave Himself as a ransom price shall surely be His forever." And, if Christ didn't die for me, then I was already destined for hell to begin with.

However, if God chooses not to know our choices infinitely ahead of time, then indeed we can change lives for the glory of God. In that case, if it were possible to directly affect others, it would make sense for Jesus to say, "go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you." [Matthew 28:19]

Now you might be thinking as some of my peers have, "Aren't you limiting God to being inside time with that argument?" No, I'm not. Here's why:

But do not forget this one thing, dear friends: With the Lord a day is like a thousand years, and a thousand years are like a day. The Lord is not slow in keeping his promise, as some understand slowness. He is patient with you, not wanting anyone to perish, but everyone to come to repentance. [2 Peter 3:8-9]

God is still not limited by time. But, He chooses to occasionally operate within its limits for the same reason He operates in space. We are limited by it. And, here's the kicker, He loves us. That makes me smile every time. Still, his time scale isn't linear. That makes Him awesome.

"That's cool, Curtis, but what about Jeremiah 29:11?"

For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

"How could God know what to plan without knowing our choices beforehand?"

That's a great question. Here's what I think:

There are these books called "Choose Your Own Adventure" that are made for preteens mostly. They don't read like normal books. When you're reading one, you'll eventually get to a page that says:

• If you push the shiny red button, turn to page X.
• If you exit the room, turn to page Y.

I always leave a numbered sticky note at that choice so that I can go back later when, after many more choices, my hero dies from some unforeseen danger or comes out on top. That's what I think life is like. I figure that God, being omniscient, is able to foresee every possible outcome to every choice in an infinity of possibilities. He doesn't use stickies. He just knows what could happen. And, if you're wise enough to ask for it or if you just get lucky, God will help influence your life for His glory which is always better. Though in one sense history has already been written, we get to choose how the story goes. I believe that this power of influence is what defines our being made in His image [Genesis 1:26].

I also think that God can at any moment see which path we will take based on our heart's condition [1 Samuel 16:7], which is determined totally by those things we allow ourselves to be influenced by. So, when I pray, "Lord, please help me conduct myself with meekness and love during the meeting," God looks at all the possible paths created by potential choices, and His Holy Spirit leads me along the right one.

Choice requires potential, love requires choice, and God loves us all. Therefore, He must be allowing each of us the potential to change our futures. For, He would not have created one with no potential to love Him. God is love. Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in him. [1 John 4:16]

Now, let's take a second to figure out how God is glorified by all of this:

If we were predestined due to Christ's only dying for those He selected be first knowing their choices, if that was the case, then we'd really just be acting out a grand play give God glory. God could always depend on us to make the decisions He knew we'd make. This play would be His expression of love for us while we would be powerless to really express our love to Him. For, without choice, love is an illusion.

But if we're not predestined, then we are free agents choosing what to be influenced by and how to react. That makes us the most unreliable subjects ever. How great our God must be to have His will and be glorified in spite of our shortcomings! Also, if our choices are our own, then we really can have an effect on the lives of others. Therefore, it's important to live according to the will of the God we serve.

Though I could say more, I feel like this part of the thought is complete. I welcome comments and challenges.

Good Friday '09

So, I was sitting in the Wendy's in Jester today and trying to comprehend why a person would ever withstand being tortured to death for something they created. I don't think there's a paper I could write, song I could sing, or video I could produce that I'd die for. But, I guess media is a little shallow anyway. The closest thing to a human that I could create, provided I had the knowhow and mental competence to do so, would be a robot. Even then though, even if this robot could bring a great service to the world or something, I still would never be willing to be tortured and brutally murdered to spare its being destroyed. However, even though I don't have kids, I know without thinking that I'd die for them if I did.

There's a disconnect between created things and humans. Something about our humanity makes altruism possible and elevates our status to rulers over creation. I think it's the soul. I honestly have incredibly little figured out about the soul. But, in the simplest terms, I believe the soul is our provision for similarity and potential intimacy with God. So, when God was chatting with Jesus on the very first Friday about what to cool thing to make next, He said, "Let us make man in our image, in our likeness, and let them rule over the fish of the sea and the birds of the air, over the livestock, over all the earth, and over all the creatures that move along the ground." [Genesis 1:26]

It had never occurred to me before just how big of a deal that was. If Jesus was willing to die for us, then He must have thought our being able to live fully and become intimate with Him was more important than His continued living. That just blows me away. I can't really grasp what that means, but the Spirit is on me right now, and I feel the statements truth.

In Colossians 1:15-17 says this: He is the image of the invisible God, the firstborn over all creation. For by him all things were created: things in heaven and on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or powers or rulers or authorities; all things were created by him and for him. He is before all things, and in him all things hold together.

So, it's Jesus' job forever to hold creation together with mind. There He was in Gethsemane weeping and sweating blood from the intense stress of the weight of the world on HIm; there He was battling with an intense inner struggle and holding everything together.

There He was, held down, the whip biting into HIs flesh and shooting fiery pain through His spine into His brain; there He was hurting more than He'd ever hurt before and holding everything together.

With a thought He could've done away with the whole of creation. That sends shivers through me. Jesus, in whom all authority lies, could have, with no effort at all, just stopped holding everything together. I always think about planets exploding when I write or say that...

Back to Jesus: there He was being hoisted onto the cross, blood loss making Him dizzy and fatigued; there He was with nails in His hands and feet holding it all together. At any point, He could've called more than twelve legions of angels to take care of Him [Matt. 26:53]. He could've just stopped caring, stopped holding it all together. But He didn't.

Why? Why did He go through with something so horrible?

He did it for love. Jesus is in love with us. He died so that we'd all have the chance to truly live. Then He rose again and put death in its place, because He's in love with us. Even though we all act like idiots most of the time, there's something inside each of us that Jesus finds attractive. That makes me smile.

Now, I want you, Reader, to take a minute or two to sit still and try to realize how in love with you Jesus is. Minimize this window. Stop instant messaging or worrying about the stuff you need to get done and just BE for a minute.

I guess Easter is sort of like Valentine's day. It's a celebration of the most devastatingly beautiful act of love ever to be performed. Jesus must be a hopeless romantic.

I hadn't initially planned on writing something so directly applicable to the coming Easter celebration, but it doesn't surprise me how this note has turned out. I usually start writing one thing, then remember some scriptures that agree, then end up writing something else that I hadn't previously thought of. As one of Christ's disciples, all spiritual gifts are accessible to me, and prophecy seems to come out in my writing. I don't really know who I'm writing this for, but I'm sure there's someone who really needed to read this. If you're that reader, don't ignore that you were just thinking about something like this. It's time for you to start doing whatever it is that you have been too afraid to do for a while.

Happy Easter!

Faith and The Will

This has been on my mind for some time, and I feel like I need to write it down. So I am.

What is the will?  I've been grappling with this question for a while, and I've decided that I'll probably never now.  Suffice to say, I have a will.  So, there really is no question of what it is or how it changes or influences the things around me.  The will just IS.

I think the will is the essence of a being.  I think the will is what makes that being identifiable and unique. I have no idea what it means for a being to have an essence.  It's an intangible sort of idea that escapes like fog through fingers whenever I try to grasp it.  But, I think there is something to it.

So, I wondered how this all related to God.  I wrote a note a while ago about how Jesus could just flex things into happening with faith acting as a sort of spiritual nerve ending.  My ideas have changed a little bit since then. I think faith has a more tangible sort of manifestation.  I think faith is really more about action.

The church is the body of Christ.  I like to think literally.  And, I don't think I'm wrong in a literal interpretation of that idea. Jesus ascended to heaven.  I have no idea how He flew.  But, I believe He did.  Now, we, His followers, are the conduit through which He physically interacts with people.  Our physical actions, motivated by His love, are His actions through us.  This idea is staggering and dangerous.  If we are HIs representatives, then the world can only know Christ through our actions...

Our service defines the God in whose name we serve to those who we are serving.  If we greet others in warmth and meekness, Jesus is seen as a lover.  However, if we greet others with condemnation and anger, Jesus is seen as a condemning judge.  I've been floored by this a little lately, and I think I'm finally starting to understand the fear of God.  I never really got it before.  But, I've just had this revelation of responsibility.  It's big.  It must be a great God who can trust His followers to accurately portray Him.

That's my microscopic, localized understanding of the body of Christ.  The macroscopic, global understanding is where faith really comes into play.  Before I explain it, I'd like for you to try something.  It's simple, incredibly doable, and familiar to you.  If you will, move your thumb up and down.  Keep doing that.  Now, think about exactly how you're doing it.  What is it that you do to move your thumb?  I have to admit that I've thought for a long time and I'm stumped.  All I know is this: my thumb moves when it is my will for it to move.  For, my thumb is always within my realm of influence.

It's like seeing an open kitchen cabinet from across the room.  You see it, want it closed, then close it.  First you move across the room so that it is within your arm-span, your realm of influence.  Then, you will that your arm would move that the cabinet would shut.  And, it shuts.

So, back to the thumb analogy: what if your thumb had nerve damage?  Only the healthy part would be within your realm of influence.  If there's nerve damage, even if you will your thumb to move a specific way, it will only move in the way that it is able.  So, if we are the body of Christ, if we are the physical manifestation of His will, then each of us is sort of like a nerve.  If we are faithful, then we'll do what is needed without knowing why it is needed.  We'll sense His will in us, then act our part.  But, if we don't...if we say no in that moment the Spirit is leading us, then our part of the body is made to contort awkwardly and is unable to function fully.

An unhealthy church is like a sickly contorted hand.  It attempts to bring comfort but ends up scratching instead of caressing.  Its extension brings horror and fear rather than comfort and security.  [Read "Stumbling Toward Faith" by Renee Altson for an incredibly frightening illustration of this.]

If the world is to change, we must be the agents of change.  That means acting when the Spirit leads us.  That means walking in tune with the Spirit so that we are sensitive to its direction.  That means saying "yes" to Jesus every day.  That means saying yes even when it's easy to say no, even when saying yes makes us uncomfortable, even when a situation seems foreign and bigger than our yes.

My God is the God of love.  Love is His essence.  All love seems grand because it is an image of Him, Eyeh Asher Eyeh.  Love is voluntary.  It can not be forced because it is defined by and therefore totally relies on the will.  A person cannot love because.  Love is not because.  Love is.  So, there's a choice required.  I don't really understand the compatibility of choice and the will, but I recognize the constant presence of a choice.  God, wanting to reveal His essence, continuously gives us a choice: yes or no.  I'd just like to urge my readers to say yes.  It's so much better to say yes.

It occurs to me that Mary could've said no.  There must have been a bunch of other virgins in the area who would be happy to give birth to the One Righteous.  But, after Mary found favor with the Lord, she was given the chance to be used.  She said yes.  And, she was blessed for it.  The world was blessed for it.  I'm convinced that there's no way Mary could've grasped just how big a deal her saying yes was.  She must've known the implications of becoming pregnant.  It was the most uncomfortable and adverse of situations. But, she said yes...

We are the generation that can bring about a change in the way the world sees the church.  We can be a healthy hand outstretched and welcoming.  But, we won't be if everyone doesn't do their part by saying yes to the Spirit.  Ephesians 4:16 says that the body of Christ grows and builds itself up as every part does its work.  So, if the church isn't growing, it's our fault collectively.  For, the highest cannot stand without the lowest.

What if we all said yes to the leading of the Spirit?  I've got to say, the idea is exciting.  But, it won't happen if we don't all do our work.

A Lesson Learned From Teendom

If people will be your friends while you're an awkward teenager, you'd better cherish them. Honestly, teenagers are difficult to deal with.

Being warm and kind is better than being cool.

A Night of Prophecy

Tonight at lighthouse, after the message Chris spoke, he told us all to get in a circle and prophesy. I've been wanting the gift of prophesy for a while now, and it turns out that I already had it. Before I actually prophesied, I was prophesied over. It was awesome!

"Faithful... I just keep hearing the word faithful." - big Chris

"Protector." - little Chris

"Overseer." - Andy

"There's hard times ahead, but there's a light at the end of the tunnel." - little Chris

"Just like in the surveying you did over the summer, I keep seeing you looking through the instrument [setting the sight] on something ahead; like Chris was saying with the light at end of the tunnel." - Andy

I don't know yet what exactly those things mean, but I feel like I'll look back on this in the not too distant future and understand.

After I was prophesied over, I prophesied (along with the others) over Chris, David, Mason, Elizabeth, and Andy.

Chris:

I had a vision of Chris running. He wasn't in a race; it seemed like a metaphor for life. He was running, and being recharged every step. Andy saw him running and carrying a torch that brought light to those around him. He said he saw people following Chris.

David:

I had a vision of David sitting beneath a tree that was by a river. I think God was the tree. Like God's influence totally surrounds and supports David. David was just smiling and looking around at the beauty of the scene surrounding him. I also saw a burning fire. I think it was David's fire for God.

Mason:

I saw mason dismantling a wall that was in front of him. He was holding a trowel, and whenever he pushed it into the dry mortar, the mortar loosened up and became wet again so that he could easily scoop the stones into the wall he was building next to him. I saw a sort of bluish essence where the wall had been that looked to me like a bond between Mason and whoever first was behind that wall. Mason was building that wall next to him for protection against 'men of Satan [said little Chris]'. I also saw Mason doing this dorky, funny dance for the amusement of the people inside the wall.

Andy:

Before Andy got in the middle of the circle, he asked all of us to just sit for a minute and be aware of all the angels that were in the room with us. It was really weird because after a while, I started seeing this bluish flying man with multiple faces flying around us like a tornado and smiling exceptionally wide. Then, when I closed my eyes, I saw an incredibly bright, golden man sitting cross-legged next to Andy and smiling just as wide while laughing and rocking back and forth. It was a victory laugh. After Andy got in the middle of the circle, I could close my eyes and see the golden man [which I'm now positive was an angel] standing behind Andy, bending over him and rubbing his shoulders. When I said this, Andy said he could feel it. Then, I saw Andy looking over a great distance across the sea to the lighthouse surrounded by a forest packed with trees that were a dark green. Andy was looking over and smiling like he was remembering something. I kept seeing that golden angel.

Elizabeth:

When Elizabeth got in the middle, I immediately felt like crying. I'm not sure why. It wasn't negative at all though. I seeing a vision of her sitting and listening to people. She nodded her head like she understood whatever it was that she was listening to. Big Chris said he kept experiencing a quickened heart beat that moved to his extremities. Little Chris and Andy and Mason continually talked about Elizabeth being a light source that spread through the darkness in various ways. I heard in my head God telling me, "Tell her to remember that she's special to me." Even now as I type this, I can remember the power of the words and it's making me cry. Big Chris said he heard, "Big Momma". I have no idea how that is significant.

God is moving in unprecedented ways in Lakehills. Big things are coming.

The First Christmas As I See It

This story is in no way to be thought of a s direct translation. I'm telling all of you readers what I imagine when I read the Bible's account of Christmas.  It's filled with anachronisms and additional, possibly fictitious descriptions.  If you want an absolutely accurate account, read the actual passages I've referenced.  I hope you'll think about Christmas in a new way after reading this:

{From Luke 1:26-39"}

God sent His angel, Gabriel, to Nazareth, Galilee

so that he could talk to Joseph's fiancée, a virgin named Mary.

The angel said to her, "Get excited! You are a very blessed woman because God has found favor with you."

Then Mary was like, "Oh crap, I'm going to die. Or else, I've gone crazy."

The angel saw her worried look and said, "Whoa, Mary.  Seriously, don't freak out.  God likes you. 

In fact, pretty soon you'll be pregnant with a baby boy whose name will be Jesus.

He's going to be great, and God's going to give Him David's throne.

And, He'll reign over the Jews and His kingdom will last forever."

Then Mary did a double-take and said, "How can I be pregnant when I've never had sex?"

The angel replied, "God isn't limited by anything.  So, Jesus' only Father will be God.

Elizabeth, your relative, is also pregnant.  She, who was barren is now in last month of her second trimester.

Because, with God, nothing is impossible!  Like I said, God is not limited."

Mary was floored by this news and said, "I'll serve the Lord and have this Baby!" Then, the angel left.

Mary went to visit Elizabeth for a while.

When she returned, she was showing.

Joseph was pretty hurt when he saw this and suspected that she had cheated on him while she was gone.  If nothing else, he thought, Mary had dishonored him by being promiscuous.  Besides, Mary was saying these crazy things about having God's baby and Joseph figured she must just be drawing inspiration from the mythologies.  He figured that she was a nutcase.

{From Matthew 1:19-21}

But, since he was an 'honorable guy with good character', he decided he'd keep the info private and just forget about her so that the town wouldn't stone her to death for disobeying the law.

Then, he had a dream in which an angel appeared to him and said, "Joseph, Mary isn't crazy.  Go ahead and marry her.  God really is the Father of the Baby.

She'll have a Son, and you'll name Him Jesus because He's going to save people from their sins."

{From Matthew 1:24-25}

Then Joseph woke up, thought about everything, and decided that He'd do what the angel said.  He and Mary were soon married.

And, Joseph and Mary didn't consummate the marriage until after Jesus had been born.

{From Luke 2:1-35}

A little while later, Caesar Agustus wanted to know where people were from, what their annual incomes were, how many children they had, etc.  So, he decreed a census. 

(This was during Quirinius' reign as governor.)

So, everyone had to travel in heavy traffic until they got back to the homes they had left.

Joseph (great-great-...-grandson of David) left Nazareth, Galilee and went to Bethlehem, Judea (where David was from).

Mary went with him.  She was pregnant and fussy.  The trip was especially hard on her back and she didn't enjoy it one bit.  She wanted a tuna and peanut butter milkshake.

As it turns out, Mary's water broke and she had to give birth in a dung-scented stable in Bethlehem.

She gave birth to her first child, a Son.  Then, she wrapped Him up tightly so He'd quit squirming out of the feed-trough.  They were only in the stable because the inn had no vacancies.  After all, there must have been many returning to Bethlehem for the census. 

Not too far away, there was a gang of shepherds making sure their sheep didn't fall off of any cliffs or run away or get run over or eaten by predators.

All of the sudden, a shining man stepped out of nowhere and the area was illuminated by God's utter awesomeness. The shepherds cowered and nearly wet themselves.

Then, the shining man said "It's ok, guys.  I've got some awesome news and you're going to be psyched! 

Over in Bethlehem, the human incarnation of God was just born.  He's going to save the world.

You're not being Punk'd.  Look for an infant bundled up in a feed-trough."

Then, out of thin air, a bunch of more shiny, flying angels appeared and started worshiping God and belting out powerful sounding phrases like, "Let the most supreme Glory be to God; the earth be filled with peace and good will towards men!"

This went on for a while. Then, when the angels had gone back into the heavens and the shepherds had regained bladder control, they said to each other, "What the ****!?!  That was awesome!  We absolutely have to go check it out."

They dropped their sheepsticks and sprinted to the stable.  When they caught their breaths again and stopped seeing spots, they found Mary, Joseph, and the Infant.

After they saw Him, they told all their friends and changed their facebook statuses to "*Shepherd's Name* is in awe" and would later comment on each other's pages and video blog it.

All the people who heard their story thought it was freaking awesome.

Mary stayed deep in thought for a while.  And Joseph saw her get that look that mothers get all the time. 

Then, that same night, the shepherds came back and danced and sang and bowed and worshipped.

Eight days later, the Infant was circumcised and named Jesus because an angel told Mary to name Him that before He was even two-celled.

After the three had waited out the "proper purification waiting time" of the day, they brought Jesus to to the city to be dedicated in a church.

It was the Abrahamic-monotheist thing to do.

They also slaughtered two little birdies according to the law of the Lord.

This old man named Simeon, who was very dedicated to the Scriptures and a really swell guy, had the Holy Spirit on him.

He knew that he wouldn't die before seeing God-On-Earth.

The Spirit led him to the temple.  And, Mary and Joseph brought baby Jesus to the altar.

Simon had the honor of holding Him and performing the dedication which went something like this:

"Lord, now I can die happy.

I've seen the One who will save the world.

And, you're going to make this salvation known.

He's going to make the lost Gentiles see how to be saved and bring glory to the Israelites."

And Mary and Joseph blushed and talked in hushed tones wondering how they were supposed to deal with this weird old man saying all of this crazy stuff about their Kid.

Simeon went right on with the ceremony and said a blessing over the parents. Then he looked right at Mary and said,

"This Child is special. He's going to shake things up and bring about a sign that will be denied.

A sword will pierce right into your soul also so that a bunch of secrets will come to light."

Mary hoped she had what it would take to raise the Christ.  She started to tear up.

{From Matthew 2:1-11}

After Jesus had been born in Judea in the days of Herod, the king, sages from the East came to Jerusalem.

They started asking, "Where is the Child who has been born King of the Jews?  We saw His star to the South West while we were in the East and have come to worship Him.

When Herod heard this, his insecurities and fears led to outrage and made life miserable for the people of Jerusalem.

So, after he called a meeting with all the smartest people in Jerusalem, he asked them where this Christ would be born.

They said he'd be born in Bethlehem, Judea because a prophet had prophesied it:

"Bethlehem, you aren't the least of Judah; for out of you a Ruler will come who will act as Israel's Shepherd."

Then, Herod called a secret meeting with the sages and asked them when the star had appeared. He used their answer to figure out about how old Jesus would be by then.

He then sent the sages to Bethlehem and told them, "When you eventually find this Christ Child, come back and tell me so that I can worship Him too."

The sages left and kept following the star, which they had seen before, until it stood over Jesus' location.

Seeing the star again, the sages were elated and did nerdy dances while giving each other high fives.

After they eventually arrived at the house, they saw the young Child playing with His mother, Mary.  Immediately, they bowed down and worshipped Him.  Then they gave Him gifts of gold, perfume, and pricey medicine.

Afterwards, an angel warned them in a dream that Herod was a dirty liar and that they should take an alternate route back to their own country. They did so.